Acne, it’s something almost everybody gets whether you are a puberty stricken teen or get the occasional adult acne (unless you are one of those perfectly spotless people who have never or will never get any kind of spot.. I’m not bitter at all!)
I thought that I would grow out of it. So when I turned 21, I was like ‘Oh it will start to get better now!’. WRONG! It got worse, so much worse. In March this year, it was the worse it has ever been. I was in so much pain with it, I couldn’t sleep or make any facial expressions. My face would bleed at night time. I had cysts on my face. It was horrible. One night, I went to the stables with Sarah, Susan and Laura and I felt so crap all night and of course drinking got the little voice in my head saying all these horrible things and I ran home crying and locked myself in my room. I had one of the worst panic/anxiety attacks I have ever had that night. I do know why my acne got so bad. In January, I went to see a dermatologist. She put me on two tablets, one to produce acne to get it all out of my system and then Roaccutane. I was on the the first tablet a month before I could take the Roaccutane and that is why my skin got so bad. Timing couldn’t have been worse as I had a Ball in that time and my confidence was so low, I questioned not going to the Ball at all (I had even bought a Moschino dress for it!!!) I just hated the way I looked, no amount of makeup could cover up my acne. Of course photos were taken and I absolutely hated how I looked. The photo below is the one that made me cry when I saw it.
Beauty routine is a very important part of my skin clearing up also. It’s only in the last two years that I have taken this very seriously. Like I mentioned earlier, I have tried every product you can think of from Ireland, England and America! But I have finally found a few products that are my favourites and the are pictured below!!
All my beauty products are high end and expensive as the cheaper products just make my skin worse. If you want to know prices, leave a comment!
Acne did heavily affect my confidence throughout my teenage years, like I mentioned earlier, I hated the way I looked. Now I am not saying I am now Beyonce beautiful (I’ll never think that!) but I feel so much more confident in who I am in my own skin. I don’t have to worry if people are staring at my skin rather than paying attention to what I’m talking about. I don’t have to worry about hearing people talk about how bad my skin is on the bus or train or in shops or even when they pass me in the street. You can see it when I smile, there is a bit of life behind my eyes again.
It’s taken me a lot of courage to post this blog. Please understand that. I have shared photos I hate of my skin. I have opened myself up to you and the internet to my biggest insecurity.
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